Honor thy father and mother? (with a poll)
Sun Jul 06, 2008 at 01:15:58 PM PDT
I am a reasonably new member of the progressive community. In fact, in college, I was vice chair of my school's College Republicans. Not a particularly forward-thinking organization. But with the rise of the "Religious Right," not to mention my own evolving political and religious beliefs, I'm now a proud Democrat. I also recently found a very open and welcoming congregation in my local United Church of Christ.
That should be all well and good, right? Here's the problem. If anyone has coped with something similar and can offer advice, I'd be so thankful:
My mom has basically rejected me. And she told my aunt, within earshot of me, that my dad, who died in 1999, would be disgusted at me because I'm a Democrat. She said that I rejected their religion (I was raised Catholic) and their politics (the aforementioned GOP,) which means that I have rejected them.
This breaks my heart, because I've done nothing of the sort. I disagree wholeheartedly with her politics (most of which are straight off of Fox news.) And on the subject of religion, I actually find a lot of similarity between the UCC and the Catholic church's teachings on social justice, so I don't understand what's so awful about finding a home in a different denomination. The true difference between us is that I don't think she's evil. She can't seem to give me the same benefit of the doubt, however.
So here's the question: Does honoring one's father and mother require holding the same beliefs? My mom seems to think so. I don't. I think part of growing up and being my own person means figuring things out for myself. But evidently, in my family, that's not allowed.
Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with those who automatically assume you're a bad person because you're not a Republican or don't share their religious beliefs? Or is avoidance the best policy? That's a little difficult to do with your own mother, however.
